January 04, 2007


Support the Troops--Triple Dip!

The first Greedy Motherfucker of the Year award goes to Lawrence Masa, a firefighter in suburban Orland Park who is charged with getting out of work with full pay and benefits by pretending to be serving in The War Against Terror (TWAT) as an active member of the military. Turns out ol' Larry was discharged back in 1988 and has been one of those "private contractors" that occasionally get burned, hanged and dragged around by angry mobs. No such luck here--he got away with almost $200,000 in salary while making the same amount working as a mercenary in Bush's war.

But wait, there's more! Larry also got a few free bucks from another suburban fire dept. he worked at part-time! Of course, he has already played the family card, saying that he is the sole provider for his wife, two spawn and an elderly relative. Well, now he really fucked them--not only will he probably get up to 15 years in the shithouse and have to pay all the money back on top of it, the worst part is that any public employee convicted of a felony automatically loses every last penny of pension contributions they made during their career. Oops.

I wouldn't worry, though--I'm sure Masa's fellow firefighters in Orland Park will be lining up to take care of his family while he's away. Especially the wife.

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